Allies

There are a few things that an ally in the work place does for you:

1. They help you realize that you are not alone.
2. They offer constructive feedback.  They can point out things you might be doing or not doing.
3. They help you strategize everything from your next project to your next position. 
4. They provide access to information. 

Women should not shy away from making connections with each other.  Men do it all the time on the golf course or even over Scotch.  Building alliances with other women is most helpful.  It takes courage to take the time to connect with another woman and get to know her.  Keep in mind that these alliance are about career building, not about snaggin another girlfirend.  Keep it professional.

Leader without having authority

Another Tennessee Summit has come and gone, whew!  This year it was suppose to be a "mini" summit and it blossomed into a full blown summit.  It is amazing when your audience wants more of what you are offering.  We used the blocks in the functional areas for the necessary training needed that has not been available to the campus.

When you think about it this is one of the only opportunities the functional/technical areas have been able to get together for collective coordinated training throughout the year and it was well recieved.

This was an "aha" moment for me, because this would be an opportunity as we bring all the campus together annually that we could capitalize upon by doing our best to make the program offers exceptionally robust.  I'm thrilled to think that going forward the task is to build one of the best training opportunities available for the universities/community colleges. 

This was a grand opportunity for me to build positive relations with my colleagues as well as my customers.  My client and/or customer is my office staff members as well as any individual from a campus.   Sometime as an administrative assistant we may not have authority, however, we certainly have influence.  As I worked to help others look good it helped me to win influence with those individuals. 

The way that I've made the most of my influence is to focus on providing superior service when dealing with my clients and customers.  As I have supported their efforts to build their track offerings, they have in turn been supportive of me and acknowledged my work in turn.  

I have also found that when others have been frustrated that they are not being heard, I can amplify their essage by mentioning them, reinforcing them and by reflecting positvely upon what they are sharing. 

Tennesee Summit was a grand success.  Kudos to all the presenters and attendees.  I look forward to next year's program. 

The office hub

It is already mid-July and this is my very first post.  I gotten side track with the summer programs on TV after work and just chilling.  Time to refocus.  As I rethink what's been going on in my life; I'm recalling that I've been more focused, direct and deliberate with working on entreprenial experience.  And that is what has taken me away from my professional blogging.  My office, mine personally often times ends up being a hub where people come to find out all kinds of information i.e. feed back on a presentation, the whereabouts of the boss, his mood, fashion questions and often timescareer advice.  You name it and people come talk to me about it.  I'm in an attempt to explode the myth that I am "just an admin" because in most cases I am truly the hub they are looking for. 

I have some of the most endearing connections and what is good about it is that I like bring people together.  It's kind of a key in lock theory.  It's not always about who you are, but aout what or who you know.  And I know some people.  I see taking on the role of the hub as one of the most valuable people in an organization.  I network with others in the business community, not because I have a piece of business to give them at that moment, but I might in the future or I might refere someone who will give them that piece of valuable information or business.  I love it.

I have countless individuals that stop by on a daily basis just for me to give them a read on a personal or professional scenario.  I appreciate their confidence in my insight.  From where I sit, I can see things from a very different and non-judgmental empowering position.  In most meetings, I'm meeting new people and making connections which is what networking is all about. 

Today, I had a CIO tell me that he is looking for a new adminstratve assistant and so I'm on the look out talking to other people that I know in the area that mayknow someone looking for a job or even a change. 

I have a few leads and I'm going to send them his way.  That connection will be a good one if I send him a good take charge individual.  I'll let you know how that works out in one of my next blogs in the months to follow. 

Ten Steps to Confidence at Work

1. Stay focused on the task.
2. Build on your strengths:  identify and captalize on them by working them into whatever you do.
3. Work on reducing for eliminating your weakenesses.
4. Believe in yourself Say three affirmations before going to bed.  Tell yourself three things that you like about yourself or three things that went well during the day.
5. Keep track of your daily accomplishments.  Begin a "kudos" file and regulary review it for a reality check of your talents adn a personal pat on the back.
6. Know that your confidence will be threatened at times.  Accept it.  If you on the end of a mean comment that shakes your confidence give yourself 24-48 hours before responding or making any important decisions.
7. Ask pepole that you respect what they think are your greatest srengths.  Then find ways to use them.  Ask them what they have seen you do that they would like to see you do more?  Sometimes others see more talent than you recognize in yourself.
8. Challenge yourself.  Find projects and assignments that give you an opportunity to use your strengths and take on projects that stretch you.  Try something new, even if you are afraid.  Take baby seps and try to refrain from judging yourself too early in teh procss, or comparing your performance to someone who has been doing the activity for a much longer period than you.
9. Be a role model of positive attitude.  Be reesilient.  Find solutions.  Workers are drawn to those who have an upbeat attitude, especially when challenges emerge and it can start with you.
10. Carefully consider how to react to your bossand colleagues actions.   This is very important.  Elevate your emotional radar use the "levity lense".  Try parenting up w/o patronizing under these circumstances.

Decisions that were made...

It really isn't as difficult as I've been making it.  It's probably quite simple.  Unfortunately, I have so much "stuff" attached to it, I'm created a burden where there need not be one.  I'm creating a problem where none exists.  I'm causing myself a great deal of  upset for no reason. There is really no reason to fight or argue about it; to explain or to demand an explanation.  I'm clear about it.

I didn't like what happened.  It did not honor me.  It was a violation of my boundarires.  It was not in keeping with the agreement I made or agreement they made with me.  What is happening or has happened is not my choice, nor is it of my making.  So it's really very simple!  Stop looking and asking for an explanation.  Stop demanding that people do what they have already demonstrated an unwillingness or inability to do.  Accept what has happened and decide what to do about it.  One I make a decision as my grandmother would say I will be clear and I can move on.  The indecision is what causes so much confusion
.
Allow my decison to honor me.  Just right now accept what I know and feel to be right for me without trying to convince others it must be right for them. 

Provide Security

Wow!  Provide Security.  I commited to four post this month and we are in week three and I've only completed one post.  I'm behind the gun, however, don't fret I will deliver as promised.  Thanks for checking back.   T

This post is all about understanding that people are never more insecure than when they become obsessed with their fears at the expense of their dreams.  People who focus on their fears don't grow.  They become paralyzed and can't move.  Leaders are in a position to provide followers with an environment of security in which they can grow.  I've heard this echoed several times.  I read about it in "Courageous Leadership" by Bill Hybels great book if you haven't read it.  It changed my life when I read it.

 I seem to always get stuck with leaders that do not know how to create such an environment for me to grow within in my primary employment or even spiritual life.  I was just out there like a weed and just growing.  Heat and sun burning my skin and the rain almost chocking me out.  One thing about that kind of growth is you learn survival and it comes from the school of hard knocks. 

Early in my career I did have some guidance, although it was not extended.  I marvel at the people who grew up in a nutured environment with guidance and direction along every step.  It seems they would get further along.  Not sure how they feel about the guidance they recieved.  But it seems it would have been a good pairing to have someone as a mentor. 

At this point in the game, I'm grateful for three new voices in my life right now.  And these voices are constant and extremely nuturing, two are very upclose and one from somewhat of a distance.  Needless to say, it doesn't matter to me when I haven't had any.  I can truly appreciate the guidance and support that I'm getting now.  Up close or from a distance.  I'm holding onto their every word.  It has been good for me. 

Great leaders make their followers feel bigger than they are.  Soon the followers begin to think, act, and produce bigger than they are.  Finally, they become what they they think they are.  Henry Ford once said, "one of the great discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do."  A nuruturing leader proives the secruity a potential leadear needs to make that discovery..... 

Until next week, don't miss an opportunity. 

First Quarter of 2013 has ended

The first quarter of 2013 has come and gone like a March wind.  It breezed in here and who was ready for the first quarter to begin.  I certainly wasn't, however, ready or not it was on.   I have to say I came out of the shoot by setting goals mid January professionally and personally.  These goals were complete with timelines and strategies for attaining my goal.

I thought that I had clearly defined the goal, a timeline and the steps necessary for achieving each goal.  I expressed my goals in terms of specific events or behaviors ( For example, "my goal is to actively return to college in a degree program.") that was just an example.  

As I reflect and review the achievings of the first quarter were many, however, none of them quite what I had prepared or planned out to do.  The bottom line with the goals that I set I allowed life to get in the way and I got off track.  I've reviewed each goal and decided whether or not it is worth my time to continue with working to achieve it in the 2nd quarter or do I need to scrap it all the way. 

I will just tell you that one of my goals is to complete 4 posts to each of my blogs for the month and that is just one post a week.  I've set the theme for the month as renewal and I'm on my way.  I'll be stopping at a local coffee house a couple of times a week to work on each post.  I'm excited about it and I'm going to achieve this goal for April and expect to work it right through to June.   Second Quarter and it is on...... Stay tuned for next weeks post.  It will be all about Spring renewal.  Until then always be prepared to seize the moment. 

Diane

CAP Certification

I passed my CAP certification!   After taking 2 non-credit courses, declining numerous lunch invitations, scheduling study sessions with others taking the course, creating note card, taking annual leave to crash course study for the grueling 4 1/2 hour exam I passed!!!  Whew hoooooo. 

After taking the exam I really didn't talk about it because there weren't any words to describe what I felt around the the preparation and the exam.  I'm grateful.  

Diane Bonner, CAP 

Take the leap

Honestly, I can not believe the 12 months of 2012 passed so quickly.  Boy, what a ride of the unknown it was for me.  It seems it was just January and I was considering a transformative change in my life when it came to where I worshiped and served.  I had struggled with the decision to begin using my gifts and talents at another ministry in addition to the one I've been attending for the last decade. I had been pondering this decision for years. Yes, years and it came to the point where I decided now is the time to do it.  Why wait until you are 90 years old to run a marathon.  There are just some things that you ponder in your heart and they are not for the eyes or mouth of others.  I pondered this decision for days, weeks, months and years.  So when I made the decision it was one that came with a lot of prayer and thought.

Every situation spoke to me about what are you waiting for, it is time to actualize what you have been thinking and talking about.  Either do it or stop thinking about it.  I could not continue on the path I was on because I was miserable.  It was what TD Jakes call silent frustration.  It was a decision that was necessary for my spiritual survival, however, an extremely difficult one to make. As I made the decision, there were those welcoming me on the other side of the change and as well those naysayers standing behind and snearing.  Those that I never thought were against me were against me. And secretly desired to see me fail.  The silence was deafening.  Still I pressed on....   

I made the leap in January 2012 to try something different.  I decided that if I was going to die a silent death that  I might as well die going after something worthwhile.  This decision had been one that was a long time coming.  As much to my surprise, when I made the leap I made a perfect landing.  It was unreal and I was received with arms of love and acceptance.  I came up with many reasons why it was successful which I will give in another post in latter this month. 

The way I began to know the voice of God more was in sacrificing everything I knew and loved up to his request and then waiting on him to show up.  You know what he showed up for me.  In this decision, I walked alone and it was difficult.  To be honest, I prayed with every step and I had to hold my cards close to my chest and just trusted that I had heard his voice.  I just knew that God had something more for me to learn and I had to listen to his voice.  In listening to his voice, I learned an enormous amount of information about myself and as well those around me.  One thing that I did learn was that the more you listen to the quiet small voice within the louder it gets.  When you ignore it and you ask for guidance the next time you ask the voice is quiet.  Almost nonexistant.   Why ask for advice and when you receive it you don’t take it. 

I would tell anyone it is soo worth listening to that inner voice because it is what will guide you when all else fails.  It will never leave you alone.  I’m grateful that I listened and I’ve been rewarded time and time over in 2012.  I’ve accomplished things in this leap that I could not have imagined.  Even in my leap, I expected doom and gloom.  Although, I attempted to have a positive outlook it was difficult because it was the unknown.  I am now learning more expect the good with anything because it has just as much the propensity to turn out good rather than bad.  The universal law of attraction comes into play. You attract what you expect.  So expect the best and deal with the bad when it it happens.  Keep a positive outlook regardless.  

 I actually thought I was being disobedient by wanting something more than I had, however, I found it that was not the case I was actually being obedient in listening to God.  Of course many other people didn’t agree and still don’t, however, I now know that it was a path that I had to take to understand and know more the voice of God. 

The one thing that I would say that I conquered in 2012 was fear of the unknown and I am still amazed at what I am encountering.   And because I didn’t let fear stop me I gained a greater understanding of how to make good decisions and better ones for me persnally.  If your decisions are made based in fear they will become bad decisions, however, if your decisions are made based in conquering fear they have a good chance of being good decisions.  Everything you learn from the decision will be par for the course.  Life is a class and you only learn by doing.  

To realistically take the leap, I had to think back to when I made the decision to move across the nation from the north to the south.  The decision to come to Tennessee was not the accepted or approved decision and many people in my life said “no” you shouldn’t do it.  But I look back at that decision and realized how I didn’t let fear of the unknown stop me from making the move.  And because I didn’t let fear stop me I landed well.  Take the leap!  It is worth it.